Giving up the Bottle

Until fairly recently, Hugh was still taking a bottle at naptime and bedtime. This is kind of embarrassing to admit, since most pediatricians and child care-type people recommend (rather firmly) giving up bottles around one year. For us though, this was hard to give up. We did sleep training with Hugh as a baby and he has really been a champ from early on - sleeping from 6PM to around 6AM for the longest time. And why rock the boat? Whenever he was ready to go to sleep, all we had to do was sit in the dark with him for a few minutes, then put him down with his blanket (Bubuh) and a bottle and he went happily to sleep. He chewed up nipple after nipple though (bottles, not mine) and finally around his second birthday we threw the last one away. We switched to the Munchin brand sippy cup with a silicone top, which is pretty much as close as you can get to a bottle. We've probably bought between six and eight of these, and he has destroyed the tops, one by one. Finally, this past week, the final "bottle" was starting to show some wear and we started talking to him about it... letting him know that when this one fell apart, there would be no more bottles.

(Hugh with Bubuh and "bottle", on our way home from the beach.)


Then it happened. The top was hanging off and it became a choking hazard. For one day we let him carry around the topless cup and complain. Then I tossed it. At first we tried giving him a normal (Playtex) sippy cup of milk at bedtime and naptime, but then I realized that this was nuts. He's rejecting milk in any form other than the bottle, so why struggle to get him to take milk in bed? He's pissed off anyway, so let's just go ahead and deal with both issues at once: getting rid of "bottle" and stopping bedtime milk. So now we're offering milk during the day in a sippy cup or big kid cup and just letting him have a cup of water to take to bed. It's been a rough transition, but not as bad as I anticipated. Night before last was bad... lots of crying and some waking during the night. His nap yesterday was the worst... pretty much crying for about 35-40 minutes solid. There was no comforting him (though I tried). Last night though... so easy! We read stories with Rosemary, then brushed teeth, then read one more story in his room while he sipped on some water, then went to bed. He talked to himself quietly for about 30 minutes, then went to sleep. And SLEPT ALL NIGHT!! Yes! Today at naptime he fussed for about 15 minutes and then went to sleep.

As I type this, I realize that it's most likely intensely boring for anyone who doesn't have a toddler. Most parents don't talk much about this stuff because it's dull and it makes us look kind of inadequate as parents. Or at least I feel that way. But for the handful of friends who might like to know they're not alone in any rough transition for their kids, I write this. I'm learning that doing my best is good enough. I love my children and strive to make the best decisions for them, and for our family and myself, as I can manage every day. I'm learning that comparing myself to other parents isn't helpful for anyone. And that in the rear view mirror someday these struggles might seem really small. But right now, helping my kids grow and become more independent is huge. It's what I do. At this moment, it's the most important job I have.